Everything looks terrible: A round-up of recent movie trailers

So, here we have Marvel Comics' Thor, set in the same cinematic universe as Iron Man and The Incredible Hulk. Have a look -

So, my main fear here is that I've just seen the whole movie, and the biggest set-piece is Clark Gregg vs Gort in some old-timey western town. Secondary fear is that he'll be sans hammer for the majority of the film, and I'll be forced to suffer through his obsession with jump kicks.

Also, I generally love Kenneth Branagh's use of diverse casting, but shouldn't the Norse gods look mostly, I dunno, Norse? Or at least uniform sounding; why have a British Odin and an Australian Thor?

Overall, it's just looking a bit small in scope for such a potentially epic story. The best comic book Thor tales that I've read all dealt with the intrigues of Asgard, not humanity's reaction to the existence of the God of Thunder.

Next up, Transformers 3, subtitled Dark Of The Moon -



I love the plot here; Neil and Buzz on some wacky first-contact mission during their downtime from landing on another celestial body. Unfortunately, the star of the film still appears to be Shia, so it probably jumps ahead to 2011 soon after. So really, this is a flashback scene that will be the key piece of mythology for the film, but as to the plot itself we're given no clue. I'm guessing it'll have a bunch of giant robots smashing the shit out of each other, but who knows? Hated the first film, but actually ended up enjoying the ridiculous excesses of the second, so this one's a toss up for me. It'll be interesting to see if operating in 3D will slow down Bay's visual style at all.

Last, and least, is Real Steel -



It looks like a joke, but that's an actual film. They actually made a movie out of "Rock 'em, Sock 'em Robots". Hugh Jackman seems like a great guy, and is a fantastic actor, so it pains me that his taste in scripts is so terrible. Any hope that you might harbor for this should be washed away by the knowledge that it's directed by Shawn Levy. "Who?", you ask? IMDB that fucker, and weep.

Eh, who am I kiddin'? That shit looks hilarious. I'll probably see it in the theater.